Yup.

I'm prego. 18 1/2 weeks along.

Due: July 26th

And ...

Boy! Here's a vid of us cutting the cake. We had the doctor put whether it was a boy/girl in an envelope and seal it without telling us and we took that to a bakery. They colored the inside accordingly and we cut the cake with some family and friends. My dad is the one filming/narrating

And that top picture ... we were messing around with my brother, Mike, after taking family pics at Thanksgiving and we didn't even know that I was actually a month pregnant! Quite ironic, but it worked out nicely.

We feel extremely blessed and grateful that I'm pregnant and to have a child (not counting our dog, Charles). But it has been surprisingly difficult so far. Much different than I ever imagined it to be. It's definitely one of those things that unless you've experienced it for yourself, you can never fully grasp the adventure your body is given. Up until about 2 weeks ago, I was throwing up 10-15 times a day ... sometimes up to 30+ times in a day. Despite being on the strongest anti-nausea meds, I could still throw up everything I ate in a day. Best way to describe it, I felt like I had the stomach flu everyday, all day. I had to get a couple of IV's because I was going days without keeping any food down. I've lost 13 lbs so far. Honestly, it was really hard on me and it took its toll on me not only physically but emotionally. My body was freaking out and I couldn't really do anything to help myself and I was struggling to get to work everyday or do just about anything.

There is a light at the end of the tunnel - I've been doing significantly better these last couple weeks. We figured out that my stomach's acid has been whacking out from my acid reflux and history of ulcers. So I'm stocked up on meds, anti-acid, anti-nausea, and prenatal. But they seem to be working so far and we're crossing our fingers that it stays that way. I still don't feel normal or awesome and I still have some bad days but I can at least function on a regular basis now, keep food down and I can get my regular hours in at work and do a little bit at home, if I'm not too exhausted from working all day. I've gained 2 lbs back, so I'm at least headed in the right direction now, ha. I'm just barely barely barely starting to show a little prego-belly ... not really though.

Matt has been an awesome husband. He's super patient with me and my hormonal-ness and helps out tons. He gets lots of kudos to him. We went to Ross the other day, and he found a set of Nike onesies and Air Jordan onesies and we just had to get them ... he was so excited. I have a feeling Matt is going to be choosing most of our little guy's outfits.

My best hormonal freak out so far:

I was really hungry and decided to make mac n' cheese for dinner. I left the noodles cooking in the water too long and so they got super soggy and gross. I was so furious that I had to clean out the pan and start over and that I had to wait even longer to eat. I was fuming over the mac n' cheese. Matt just looked at me and said, "You know you're getting emotional over mac n' cheese, right?" I knew it and just didn't care, I was so mad. Matt took over making it so that I would maybe calm down.

Anti

I've been kinda anti blogging lately. Hence the no blog posts for basically the last long forever. So I guess our lives will continue to be a mystery for the time being.

Hopefully, maybe, someday soon I'll get back the motivation to write posts again. Maybe.

But for now ... HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

He's Back!

Matt was cleared to play last Tuesday by the NCAA. We're so happy and I couldn't be more proud of him. Thank you to everyone that has extended their prayers and support these last couple months. We sincerely appreciate it. We are especially grateful to both of our families, Coach Mendenhall, all other coaches and football staff, and Matt's academic advisor. They have all been wonderful and such integral parts in this process. Thank you.

And his first play back in the game ... solo tackle for loss. That's my hubbs.

Photo credit: BYU Photography

*sorry the pic is too big ... I'm still figuring out the 'big picture' uploading*

Media

So, there's some rumors and things being said about my husband and football throughout the media right now. And since there's not a whole lot of you that read our blog, I want to explain a few things.

At this point in time, Matt is not eligible and is not participating in fall camp. HOWEVER, he is diligently working on changing that status and becoming eligible by the time school starts. He is also training and conditioning independently from the team. That is really all you need to know. The details of his situation and circumstances are personal and do not need to divulged to the world.

You can rarely trust the media. Which is why I wanted to write this post. If there's anything that you are wondering, or questioning regarding all of this, etc ... please don't search the media or listen to rumors for the answers. Please ask Matt or I. I'm happy to answer any questions you may comment on this post. We'd rather have you get a direct, honest answer from one of us, than read incorrect information and make assumptions that aren't valid (which is what the rest of the world is doing right now).

I also urge you to not read the comments and what people are assuming and saying about Matt. They don't know him, they don't know the circumstances, our situation, etc, and are giving opinions based off of a few lines they've read in some articles. If you are confronted about it because you do know Matt, please tell them the same information that I have given you and stick up for him.

He is a good person. He's human, and therefore not perfect, just as we all are. He's doing his best. I am proud of him. I believe in him. I am standing by him and I will not speak a negative thing about him or the football program. I love my husband very much.

Matt's facebook status reads this: "A man was not defined by his flaws but by how he overcame them"

Learning

These last couple months have had themes reoccurring throughout my everyday life ... looking forward with faith, strengthening faith, and tithing. God is trying to teach me. I can almost feel that I'm not fully grasping what it is that he's trying to get into my head and soul but I am learning, slowly.

A few months ago is when I started to notice this trend of themes. It was like every week at church was either faith or tithing centered and it was all directed at me. It had been a few months since we had paid our tithing cause I kept forgetting and so we owed quite a lot of money to get us back to being full-tithe payers. It was weird how we had duplicate lessons in different wards about paying tithing and it's blessings. After a couple weeks, Matt and I felt like we needed to pay our tithing immediately. And so we did. And the Lord blessed us ... with things pertaining to buying our house that I don't think would have happened if we didn't pay our tithing. And the funny thing is, that since we wrote that check, we haven't heard a thing or lesson or talk or whatnot about tithing ... God was nudging us to do it so he could give us those blessings that we needed and once we listened, He moved on to nudging me in another direction.

And then faith. I kept hearing things about faith - lessons, talks, ensign, stories, etc. After a couple weeks, I had the feeling I needed to strengthen my faith and God was trying to prepare me for something coming my way. Well, I can't say that I immediately was totally strengthened and then when the trials came I was just peachy and everything was good and ok. Things have been hard. And a lot harder emotionally than I ever anticipated. I've been really tested these last couple months, and I still am being tested.

The lessons on faith keep coming and every time they do, they nudge to me to keep going and push forward and remember that things really aren't that bad. And the biggest thing of all is that it's not my plan for our life, it's God's. I can't be in total control of my life, God is the one in control. And as such, I need to put all my faith in him that things will work out ok and everything will be for our good and that He's watching out for Matt and I. I know He is. I think this will be one of those times in our lives that we will look back on and see just how much we grew and what we learned and how it made us better people.

I don't know where Matt and I will be a year from now. We don't know what life has in store for us. NFL, Radiology, More school, Utah, Not Utah, Optometry, Kids, No kids, etc? We're looking out to a future of the unknown. I just need to have faith that what's supposed to happen is what will happen. I encourage anyone to read this talk by Russell M. Nelson, Face the Future with Faith. It's been one that has really stuck out to me. I've had 2 lessons on it and read it on my own a couple times. There's a lot of things in this talk that I really needed to hear these last couple months.

"If we pray with an eternal perspective, we need not wonder if our most tearful and heartfelt pleadings are heard."

"Strength comes when you remember that you have a divine nature, an inheritance of infinite worth. The Lord has reminded you, your children, and your grandchildren that you are lawful heirs, that you have been reserved in heaven for your specific time and place to be born, to grow and become His standard bearers and covenant people. As you walk in the Lord’s path of righteousness, you will be blessed to continue in His goodness and be a light and a savior unto His people."

"President Monson continued: 'My beloved brothers and sisters, fear not. Be of good cheer. The future is as bright as your faith.'"

I'm still learning. Things will work out and Heavenly Father is strengthening me everyday and is continually blessing me with tender mercies. I'm trying to look forward to the future with faith and trust in God.

Gents

Happy Father's Day to my boys!

Of course there's the hubby - he's sorta, kinda a dad ... just look how cute they are. And he's the future father of our children. I found a Mr. Incredible pop up card to make him for today ... it was perfect. There's so many things I could say (good things of course) but I'll just say ... I Love You Sweetheart!

And then there's my poppy. Look at this daddy daughterness at one of Matt's football games ... ha ... awesome though right? Cause my dad is awesome. He's taught me so much and I've learned even more from his example. Love you!

And last but not least ... my father-in-law. I basically love this picture. He helped shape Matt into Matt, my husband , what more can I say? I kinda feel indebted to his parents for raising the man I love so dearly, my husband. I've only known Greg for a few years but have learned much from his wisdom. Love you.

I could go on for a looonnnggg time about each one of these fellows ... but I'll restrain myself ... and I still need to do this for my mother's for mother's day ... I'm so behind. Anywhoos ... Love you boys! And Happy Father's Day to all the other gents out there!

Approved!

The bank accepted our offer!...finally. Long story short - this town home is different than the one we initially put an offer on ... the seller's agent was rather ridiculous and we discovered he was pretty much helping his friend's squat in the house as long as possible before it actually forecloses....that's a whole nother story.

So ... we gave up and moved on and found a new town home in the same area, put an offer in about 6/7 weeks ago, and .... voila! Approved! So ... we'll be moving in about a month. This whole thing has kinda been a mess and we're so happy to be at the end of it.

We're soo excited Sir Charles will live with us and we'll have a place of our own and our lives will [hopefully] go back a little closer to normal. Yay!